A Ritual for the Sorrows of the World - Working with Francis Weller’s Third Gate of Grief
with Sheila Kappeler-Finn
A Ritual for the Sorrows of the World - Working with Francis Weller’s Third Gate of Grief
with Sheila Kappeler-Finn
with Sheila Kappeler-Finn
A half-day, in-person, facilitated workshop designed to welcome participants to the embodied and communal work of grief ritual.
Sheila invites you to a half-day grief retreat and ritual where we will unburden our hearts of the collective sorrows we carry for the suffering in the world.
Grief is an integral part of life that requires our attention if we want to be fully available to her sisters: Praise and Gratitude. In Western culture, however, we have suppressed the art of how to share our grief in community. When we add the impact of our personal losses to the impact of escalating violence and turmoil within human societies, the burden of grief we carry as individuals begins to feel unbearable.
Maybe you're grieving the suffering of others; grieving violent deaths like those killed in tragic mass shootings, wars, and genocides; grieving systemic racism, or grieving the increasing inequity across the globe. Maybe you're grieving the ongoing destruction of our beautiful natural world, the absence of birds, the many giant wildfires, floods and storms, the ongoing extinction of species, the reversal of rights happening in the courts, or the devastating loss of wilderness and beauty. Or perhaps your grief is for the divisiveness and meanness unfolding in a polarized, online culture.
There are very few spaces where we are invited to fully experience and express complex grief in the presence of others. This half-day retreat will focus on Francis Weller’s Third Gate of Grief: The Sorrows of the World to connect participants to their experiences of collective grief in the context of a co-created sudden village. The unfathomable suffering that pours in through our electronic devices leaves us feeling chronically powerless, exceedingly agitated and / or deeply sorrowful. While distress and anguish capture our minds, our hearts hold onto this content. It is in community that we find the steadiness to feel the fullness of our sorrows, in order to bring ourselves into present time with our grief.
Our time together will culminate in a simple, but powerful communal grief ritual, in which we will witness and support each other as we move into the shared experience and expression of our sorrows and losses.
We will
- establish foundational group agreements to form a stable base of kindness and group safety
- identify restorative agreements to facilitate group repair
- gradually and gently build a community container that invites everyone to drop more deeply into their hearts, which can help to metabolize distress and give the intellect a break
Practices you will be invited to take part in
- community council where we practice deep listening and receive witness
Sheila invites you to a half-day grief retreat and ritual where we will unburden our hearts of the collective sorrows we carry for the suffering in the world.
Grief is an integral part of life that requires our attention if we want to be fully available to her sisters: Praise and Gratitude. In Western culture, however, we have suppressed the art of how to share our grief in community. When we add the impact of our personal losses to the impact of escalating violence and turmoil within human societies, the burden of grief we carry as individuals begins to feel unbearable.
Maybe you're grieving the suffering of others; grieving violent deaths like those killed in tragic mass shootings, wars, and genocides; grieving systemic racism, or grieving the increasing inequity across the globe. Maybe you're grieving the ongoing destruction of our beautiful natural world, the absence of birds, the many giant wildfires, floods and storms, the ongoing extinction of species, the reversal of rights happening in the courts, or the devastating loss of wilderness and beauty. Or perhaps your grief is for the divisiveness and meanness unfolding in a polarized, online culture.
There are very few spaces where we are invited to fully experience and express complex grief in the presence of others. This half-day retreat will focus on Francis Weller’s Third Gate of Grief: The Sorrows of the World to connect participants to their experiences of collective grief in the context of a co-created sudden village. The unfathomable suffering that pours in through our electronic devices leaves us feeling chronically powerless, exceedingly agitated and / or deeply sorrowful. While distress and anguish capture our minds, our hearts hold onto this content. It is in community that we find the steadiness to feel the fullness of our sorrows, in order to bring ourselves into present time with our grief.
Our time together will culminate in a simple, but powerful communal grief ritual, in which we will witness and support each other as we move into the shared experience and expression of our sorrows and losses.
We will
- establish foundational group agreements to form a stable base of kindness and group safety
- identify restorative agreements to facilitate group repair
- gradually and gently build a community container that invites everyone to drop more deeply into their hearts, which can help to metabolize distress and give the intellect a break
Practices you will be invited to take part in
- community council where we practice deep listening and receive witness
- writing, inquiry and small group work to share our stories
- guided meditation and embodiment practices that will help you to gather your energy and attention in present time, to bear witness your inner states, and to gain discernment about your own information
- all participation is invitational; nothing is required beyond being present with and sharing the grief you carry, to the best of your ability
What to bring
A journal and pens or markers
Comfortable clothing
On grief
If you have suffered an event in the past six months that has triggered acute grief for you, please reach out to see if this workshop is a good fit. People in early stages of acute grief may need a different pacing than this workshop offers.
ABOUT SHEILA
Sheila brings a synthesis of experiences to community space holding: a 25-year meditation practice, 20 years of Non-Violent Communication (NVC) study and practice, NVC complex facilitation, NVC multi-year mediation intensive study, a decade-long apprenticeship (with a focus on ethical and respectful cultural practice) in medicine work, and grief tending and apprenticeship in the lineage of the West African Dagara tribe as brought to the U.S. and shared by Malidoma and Sobonfu Somé. The Somé’s collaborations with Francis Weller (author of The Wild Edge of Sorrow) helped to mold these community rituals and practices to meet the needs of grief carriers in the West, where grief practice is almost exclusively privatized.
From decades of depth work in group contexts, she has witnessed and experienced the power of healing in safe, well-designed community containers where people feel free to drop into their hearts. Sheila has the capacity to meet people in their depths, welcoming heartfelt and authentic participation.
“The work of the mature person is to carry grief in one hand and gratitude in the other and to be stretched large by them. How much sorrow can I hold? That’s how much gratitude I can give. If I carry only grief, I’ll bend toward cynicism and despair. If I have only gratitude, I’ll become saccharine and won’t develop much compassion for other people’s suffering. Grief keeps the heart fluid and soft, which helps make compassion possible.” ~Francis Weller
- guided meditation and embodiment practices that will help you to gather your energy and attention in present time, to bear witness your inner states, and to gain discernment about your own information
- all participation is invitational; nothing is required beyond being present with and sharing the grief you carry, to the best of your ability
What to bring
A journal and pens or markers
Comfortable clothing
On grief
If you have suffered an event in the past six months that has triggered acute grief for you, please reach out to see if this workshop is a good fit. People in early stages of acute grief may need a different pacing than this workshop offers.
ABOUT SHEILA
Sheila brings a synthesis of experiences to community space holding: a 25-year meditation practice, 20 years of Non-Violent Communication (NVC) study and practice, NVC complex facilitation, NVC multi-year mediation intensive study, a decade-long apprenticeship (with a focus on ethical and respectful cultural practice) in medicine work, and grief tending and apprenticeship in the lineage of the West African Dagara tribe as brought to the U.S. and shared by Malidoma and Sobonfu Somé. The Somé’s collaborations with Francis Weller (author of The Wild Edge of Sorrow) helped to mold these community rituals and practices to meet the needs of grief carriers in the West, where grief practice is almost exclusively privatized.
From decades of depth work in group contexts, she has witnessed and experienced the power of healing in safe, well-designed community containers where people feel free to drop into their hearts. Sheila has the capacity to meet people in their depths, welcoming heartfelt and authentic participation.
“The work of the mature person is to carry grief in one hand and gratitude in the other and to be stretched large by them. How much sorrow can I hold? That’s how much gratitude I can give. If I carry only grief, I’ll bend toward cynicism and despair. If I have only gratitude, I’ll become saccharine and won’t develop much compassion for other people’s suffering. Grief keeps the heart fluid and soft, which helps make compassion possible.” ~Francis Weller
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